Tuesday, 1 August 2017
Valerian and the City of a Thousand Planets. March 2017.
As long-suffering readers of my blog Steve Does Comics know, no one loves a good comic more than me and therefore no one loves a good comic book movie more than me.
Well, admittedly, that may not be true. I generally don't enjoy comic book movies that much but I am always intrigued to see attempts at transferring the product of that medium onto the big screen, even if, as in the case of Valerian and Laureline, I have no knowledge at all of the original source material.
Looking at the trailer, there's no denying it looks luscious, possibly the most sumptuous looking movie I've ever seen. It also sounds great.
But there is one problem.
And that's what's not in the trailer. I'm not getting any sense of what it's actually about. I'm getting no sense of who the characters are, what their motivations are, what their goals are, what their relationship is to each other or what the basic premise of the movie is. Are they good guys? Are they bad guys? I don't know. This creates the fear for me that it's going to be just one long wallow in the magic of CGI.
I'm also concerned that it's directed by Luc Besson who, as we all know, has no shortage of style but did inflict The Fifth Element on us, a film that I can safely say irritated the life out of me on the one occasion I tried to watch it.
The final thing that sets off alarm bells is the casting. I don't like to knock individuals but I do tend to feel that no director who's out to make a great movie casts Cara Delevingne in it. Likewise, Dane DeHaan's presence in a film isn't exactly likely to get me rushing off to the nearest multiplex with my money in my hand.
It also seems a bit sexist that Laureline doesn't get mentioned in the title. What is this? The 1950s? Did Germaine Greer throw herself under that race horse for nothing?